I have been waiting a good portion of my adult life to hear news like this. And, now I can say that my life is complete.

The Miami Herald is my new favorite newspaper in the world. According to The Miami Herald, women have a very specific kind of man that they are looking for. And, let's just say that it might be my lucky day.

According to a study by the University of Pennsylvania that was published in the Miami Herald, the research found that hairless men are leading the way in attractiveness, and appear more confident and dominant to the opposite sex.

The study asked male and female students to rate photos of men, judging each picture based on attractiveness, confidence and dominance — and bald men led across the board.

"Participants consistently rated natural bald men, and those who had their scalps digitally enhanced to be bald for the study, as stronger than those with thick or thinning hair."

But it wasn’t all good news for those with shining heads. Those who had shaved heads were also considered to be four years older on average.

That's OK. I'll whatever I can at this point.