Romance in the Workplace – Why You Should Let Go and Lean Into Love
I understand why workplaces say that dating a coworker is nothing but bad news, but attraction is attraction and love is love and how will you know if the person you're interested in is the one you're supposed to be with if you're so scared of career repercussions that you avoid the person at all costs?
My husband and I met 14 years ago when he worked the overnight shift and I worked the morning shift. Almost instantly, we became friends. Best friends. But, we didn't date because I was seeing someone else and because we worked together, and to do so would have been grounds for termination. We young and poor and needed the money that our jobs paid us. Plus, we loved our jobs.
I'm here to tell you though that all the scary stories you've heard about relationships with coworkers ending in a disaster don't always come true. Sure, some of the stories may be true, but my husband and I both left where we were working (for different reasons unrelated to wanting to be more than just friends) and this May, we will celebrate our 7th wedding anniversary. My only regret is that I didn't end my previous relationship and walk away from my job sooner. I regret that I allowed fear to steer my ship instead of allowing love to take the helm.
My husband and I met as coworkers and in a way, I think that is why our marriage is so strong. We both have a deep understanding of the industry in which I am in (my husband hung up his headphones) and therefore, a tolerance of the demands of my job that anyone who has never worked in this industry would be able to wrap their head around.
If there's someone you work with who you think might be the one, your forever life partner, don't write them off because of company policy. Strike up a friendship (that's the best way to walk into marriage in my opinion - as best friends first), put out feelers, talk openly, and if both of you want to take things beyond friendship, one or both of you should consider looking for a new job so that you can move forward in your relationship without violating any HR policies or making things awkward for others at work.
Do keep in mind that you should absolutely respect and follow the employee relationship guidelines issued by your employer as your company has laid down the rules to protect not only other employees but to protect YOU. Sometimes relationships can turn sour and people will abuse their power or retaliate or even harass or discriminate against the person they're in a relationship with. Dating in the workplace is a slippery slope and my personal advice is to look for another job before beginning a romantic relationship with a coworker. The mess being sneaky can cause just isn't worth it.
With that said, jobs will come and go. Your job will not be as loyal to you as you may be to it. You may only get one chance at true love in your life, so please, do not allow anyone or anything to stomp on your heart and fizzle your chance at love because when you land with the right person, it is the most beautiful thing. Life is too short to not find, know, and grow true love.